The scope of intimacy, by Jane Olowohunwa
INTIMACY ISN’T JUST ABOUT THE SEX ALONE
There’s something every couple needs, but don’t talk about often, intimacy.
Now before you start thinking “sex,” Please pause. Intimacy is much more than sex. When people hear intimacy, sex comes to mind. Sex is just a part of being intimate.
It is usually about the bond, connection, closeness, and the feeling that “we’re still in this together, and “we’re still us.”
The fact is you will always get busy as couples. Work, kids, bills and everyday stress. All of that can slowly pull you apart if you’re not intentional. And when intimacy fades, couples start to feel like housemates instead of lovers.
How do you keep intimacy alive you ask? I mentioned earlier that intimacy is not only about sex. Here are the things you should start doing again to build intimacy.
Touch often: Outside of sex. Hold hands. Hug. Sit close. Do this often because touch builds warmth and safety between couples.
Talk daily: Not just talk about chores, kids or money. Ask genuinely, “How was your day? ” or “What’s on your mind lately?”
Flirt again: Send a romantic text. Give compliments. Say “I love you” often. Act like you’re still trying to win each other over.
Spend quality time together. Just the two of you, no distractions. Even 20 minutes matters.
Be emotionally open: Share your thoughts, your fears, your dreams. That is deep intimacy. A lot of couples have stopped being open with each other.
Prioritize sex: Finally here comes the much anticipated sex. But don’t pressure it. Intimacy in the bedroom is important but it thrives best when there’s emotional closeness outside the bedroom too.
Intimacy takes so much intentionality.
It doesn’t stay alive by accident. You have to water it like a plant every day.
Don’t let routine, stress, or silence steal the spark. You don’t need grand gestures, just small moments of real connection, again and again.
We @
MMM CARES
FHH CARES